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What Hands Have Done in Cold Resentment

from Fiercely Loyal by Fearless Leader

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lyrics

Trains slide over tracks,
Where the river turns at broken intervals.

The sun beats down relentless,
a torrent uninterrupted.

He sits there waiting for much longer than he cares to wait but –
He's always been a sucker for misunderstanding.

(And we've all been suckers.)

His crushed hand throbs in his lap,
Events flash behind his eyes.

The encroaching dark hides that
crusted blood but –

He can't hide what his hands have done,
(just as they couldn't stop).

His hand shakes on the handle
Twists, and enters the room dark.

The mirror lays unswept,
a ragged mess.

The old man sits quietly,
His eyes lift.

I've never understood –
I've never found safety –
I've found a rough truth –
I've found a brutal honesty –
I've seen him as broken –
I've seen him as fallible –
I've discovered my own strength –
I've discovered an awful truth.

This is what growing up is supposed to be right?
This is destroying your idols with physical violence.
This is destroying something you've believed in.
This is destroying the one thing firm in your life.
This is how you grow to be a man.
This is resentment incarnate.
This is resentment incarnate.

I've held something of a shadow.
And between my two hands it's bled.
It's not the blood of my old man.
It was the blood of my innocence.

This is growing up right?
This is growing up?

I lower myself down and I float.
Nothing bothers me here.
The world is suddenly silent.
And I am suddenly cold.
I float.
Minnows swim through my legs.
I see the sun splashing on the current.
This is an introspective lie we tell ourselves.
This is a lie we tell ourselves.

For the second time in a day, I stand on my own two feet.

credits

from Fiercely Loyal, released December 12, 2014

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Fearless Leader Seattle, Washington

Just a couple o' nice dudes trying to shred their way to the top.

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