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Drawn in Memory

from Fiercely Loyal by Fearless Leader

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lyrics

I saw her dad standing in the middle of the street,
The watch closed and I have wet feet.

And I can’t feel my feelings –
But that’s ok because sometimes it’s better to be ruined.

And I back up where I can see myself in the mirror,
But that’s not the same – as looking out at your face.

As it’s pouring out I see the blood,
It’s dripping out, it’s no longer there.
It’s in my hands.

Why was I thinking that I would want to follow you there.
It would have been better if I just stayed where I was.

And it wasn’t the same anymore.
Now that you’re gone, and now I’m here.
And you’re here, and you’re on the ground and I’m standing over you.

It’s like I’ve always wanted,
It’s like I never thought it would be but here it is –

And I can not remember the last time I cried this hard.

These memories come in waves of joy
Filtered through a purposed, focused, misdirection.

You feel the ebb and flow,
The edges softened,
The core revealed.

This was happiness, youth long past,
A trip – streaming sunshine, lips pressing lips.

Or this was misery – personal offense.
Retained well past import;
physical discomfort upon recollection.

I held these thoughts in the palm of my hand.

The truth these memories bring,
Draw on false realities.
Truth these memories bring,
Are toxic without reflection.
And they draw us in.

I screamed to hear my own voice!
I choked on words that have kept me quiet!
I've held my tongue between my teeth
I fell in step and I slowly lost sight


I fell away!
I fell away from the things that moved me!
I fell away!
I fell away from the things that moved me!

And again I found myself in this certain position where my upbringing impacted my adulthood in a way I couldnt possibly hope to control. I find my self waiting' wanting to understand.

How I had come to live as long as I had and not been crushed by my own ego or the physical events that surround ones life. How had I come to this place, really, how did this happen? How did I come to this place, really, how did this happen?

credits

from Fiercely Loyal, released December 12, 2014

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Fearless Leader Seattle, Washington

Just a couple o' nice dudes trying to shred their way to the top.

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